Thursday, February 10, 2011

When you're coming in at last place.

The last few days I have felt so so low. No matter what I do or who I am with nothing seems to cheer me up. I'm even finding it hard to smile. I'm just tired and grumpy from running this race that is not ending and I sure as hell am not winning.

I was reading another blog the other day about the loneliness of Infertility. That horrible void that it creates in your heart and mind. I hate what it has done to me. I was always such a happy person, positive and full of life. Now all I think about it what a loser I am and how did this happen to US! We are good people. We come from good families. We can care for a child very very well. but it is just not happening. I pray all the time. I pray for other infertiles, that their dreams may become a reality and I pray for us.

Im going to stop typing for now because I am doing my own head in. I dont even want to talk about INFERTILITY ANY MORE

   
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3 comments:

  1. LisaLFebruary 11, 2011 at 1:11 AM

    I know how you feel. **HUGS** This whole infertility thing just sucks the life out of you sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  2. KerrikFebruary 11, 2011 at 2:47 AM

    I know what you mean, as I often feel that way. I have been working hard lately to have a more healthy, Zen way of seeing all of this, and I've realized that - even if I have to remind myself of it everyday - this isn't something I am "doing" to myself or my family. Just as it isn't something you have done or are doing. We aren't broken, we aren't losers and we haven't done anything wrong. This is just one of those things we can't control. All we can do it foster the optimal environment to create life, and hope that it sparks and grows.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Aleisha GFebruary 11, 2011 at 11:09 AM

    Oh Lu..
    We are in the same boat at the moment.. Totally sucks doesnt it...
    I am here for u.. When ever...
    xxx

    ReplyDelete

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