Summer Loving....

Well today is extremely warm for Perth!
I dont normally like the heat (im more of a rain, hail and snow kinda girl) but the one thing i love most about the summer is drinking amazing cocktails by the pool. I love sitting outside jumping in the pool, coming out and enjoying a drink and relaxing while the afternoon passes us by.

I love it when WJ goes into the kitchen to shake up another cocktail (the drink of choice at the moment is Hurricanes - it used to be gin and tonic and before that it was rum and cokes)

I love sitting around with my bathers on and a drink in my hand.

At the moment we are doing just that! sitting outside with a drink in our hands (and a laptop on my knee watching these grey clouds roll in with the hope of a summer storm.

These are the days I love being and i hate to say it - CHILD FREE - WOW im not supposed to go there! Well, I did.... WJ and I can sit in silence drink laugh and talk without interruption.

I sent off our forms for the new clinic today so im looking forward to this new appointment with a new doctor.. Im just worried about one thing - my autoimmune disorder is flaring up at the moment and i dont know how much this will affect our chances of getting up the duff. My autoimmune disorder is called Lichen Planius which is when the body attacks the skin instead of attacking any virus i might have and comes out in a rash type thing localised around the wrists and feet. It can also flare up in times of high stress (surprise surprise) I dont know how this affects me with my fertility. But i have read that any type of autoimmune disorder can affect implantation occurring....

well I going to get back to my darling husband as he has made me another cocktail.. He likes to get me drunk ahaha xxx

much love
Luisa
xxxx

When you're coming in at last place.

The last few days I have felt so so low. No matter what I do or who I am with nothing seems to cheer me up. I'm even finding it hard to smile. I'm just tired and grumpy from running this race that is not ending and I sure as hell am not winning.

I was reading another blog the other day about the loneliness of Infertility. That horrible void that it creates in your heart and mind. I hate what it has done to me. I was always such a happy person, positive and full of life. Now all I think about it what a loser I am and how did this happen to US! We are good people. We come from good families. We can care for a child very very well. but it is just not happening. I pray all the time. I pray for other infertiles, that their dreams may become a reality and I pray for us.

Im going to stop typing for now because I am doing my own head in. I dont even want to talk about INFERTILITY ANY MORE

   

What's Autoimmune got to do with it?

In 1996 I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder where my body attacked my skin rather than the virus I had at the time. I was hospitalised for 3 week to have intensive treatment. Since 1996 I've only had one flare up and and that was 10 years ago. But in the last few weeks vie noticed another flare up so WJ and I have been doing a lot of research into the affects of autoimmune disorders ad infertility. There definitely is a link. But my problem is I never told any of my Dr that I had this autoimmune disorder because quite simply I had forgotten about it because I hadn't been affected by it in 10 years.

So.... How much does autoimmune have to do with it?

In March I have an appointment with a new clinic because we really need to get a 3rd opinion and then 2 weeks late I have my follow up appointment with my second clinic.

Now....
Cinic 2 wanted me to loose weight and take metformin 3x day
Ive been taking the metformin but the weight is not coming off. I just dont know what to do.
The only thing that the Metformin is doing is giving me stomach cramps at night (Dh rubs my belly at night to make it feel better) and the other thing is that i am CONSTANTLY on the toilet! Our toilet paper usage has increased exponentially.

Clinic 3 - ill have to wait and see what they say. I just want to get a move on with our treatments and getting back on the baby train. I feel like i'm at a stand still at the moment and we are both getting very impatient.

Infertility is really a wild ride!!